Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Falling off the Challenge--It's all on Me

It's that long stretch of afternoon that usually gets me. Especially on Sundays. I always have things to do, but they're at war with me wanting a break from Having To Do Things.
But Responsibilities. So I had mountains of student papers to sort out into their portfolios and I didn't get a chance to mount their artowrk OR work on my bulletin board, because I still needed time to lesson plan. Then I spent that time making sure I knew how I was going to clearly explain one point perspective . We started it last week but didn't get a chance to finish it. Then various chores. Plus being sick. So inevitably, I fell off the writing and vlogging wagon. I am a a big fat disappointment to myself.
I'm famous for being really hard on myself. I'm struggling to learn to give myself a break. I have things I want to write about, I have a giant list of them. Things like observing what's happening at school and what's going on over there. I'm teaching art and drama and I have thoughts and observations about it.
I'm moving my way through my nostalgia project including Saturday Morning Cartoons and old 90's shows and music. The nostalgia hits hard. Here's one, I'm watching Star Trek TNG, having finished TOS. I'm only about 3 episodes in, but man, is Stewart a mesmerizing actor. I know this is not news to anyone, but watching this series as an appreciative adult is just a brand new perspective.
Haven't written any fan fiction, so I'm way behind that even though there have been major developments in my character's world, including Hope Hicks, who it is rumored, was responsible for the hand written note in the famous (infamous?) "listening session" by dear leader in the White House. People speculated it was Ivanka, but I guess credit goes to Hope. Methinks there's a story there.
Then there's walking. I miss walking. I was doing so good with it, and catching up on all my audiobooks and podcasts and everything, but then the weather took a turn for the shitty, and that's the end of the that for awhile. I really really miss it. And it needs to be outside.
There's so much I need to catch up because I have set myself up for so many challenges, and this is what you get--if you don't keep up with all of them, then one misstep and it screws up the whole flow. But it's all still there waiting. That's the thing about art and writing, it never leaves you, and I'm not so far behind with everything that I can't pick it back up and get back in the stride of things. It's hard to get back into the stride of things, though, like with the walking thing. Now that I've stopped, even though I miss it, (both walking and writing) I'll now find ten excuses not to do it, which is exactly what I was afraid of. And no one else is responsible for this but me, and no one can write for me, no one can walk for me, so it's all on me.

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